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Healthcare Death Panels: When Saving Money Became More Important Than Saving Lives

grief

Insurance companies are the real healthcare death panels. In 2020, after years of serving as a mental health professional, I made the heartbreaking decision to retire from counseling and therapy. I didn’t leave because I no longer cared for my patients or because the work had grown too difficult. I left because insurance companies were actively prioritizing profit over people—refusing to pay for life-saving medications that my patients desperately needed. The ethical weight of this reality became unbearable, as I found myself no longer preparing my patients for healing but instead preparing them for death.

This is the story of how a system that was meant to protect lives betrayed my patients, my profession, and my hope for a better future. It is also a story about why insurance death panels are driving health care professionals out of the profession.

Health Care Should Be About Saving Lives not about Death Panels

As a mental health professional, I spent years working with individuals who struggled with severe depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and other life-altering mental illnesses. Many of these conditions are not just debilitating—they can be life-threatening. Effective treatment often requires a multi-pronged approach: therapy, lifestyle adjustments, and, in many cases, life-saving medications. Since I worked in a medical clinic, I also saw patients with chronic illnesses like diabetes and heart disease that required medication to keep them alive. At first, I saw them because they had anxiety over how they were going to afford their medications. As the greed of the healthcare death panels grew, eventually I started seeing these people for depression because they could no longer afford their medications and they knew they were going to die.

These medications are not optional. They’re not a luxury. For many of my patients, medications such as antidepressants, mood stabilizers, and antipsychotics were the only things keeping them alive—keeping them from succumbing to the darkness of their illnesses. For my patients with diabetes or other chronic ailments, medications like insulin kept them alive.

But the insurance death panels didn’t see it that way.

Insurance Companies: The REAL Death Panels

Over the years, I watched in frustration as insurance companies consistently denied coverage for essential medications. The process was infuriatingly familiar:

  1. Doctors and therapists recommend a specific treatment plan tailored to the patient’s needs.
  2. The insurance company’s death panel rejects it.
  3. Appeals are made. Hours are spent on paperwork and phone calls. Precious time that could have been better used for patient care is wasted.
  4. Patients are left in limbo, unable to afford the medications they need to survive, denied yet again by the healthcare death panels.

This wasn’t just bureaucracy—it was a death sentence. Many patients couldn’t wait weeks or months for approvals that might never come. They were living day-to-day, fighting to keep their chronic illness from consuming them. And yet, to the insurance death panels, their lives were reduced to dollar signs and cost-benefit analyses.

My Job Became Preparing Patients for Death

healthcare death panels when saving money becomes more important than saving lives

In my last few years in the profession, I began to notice a grim shift in my role as a therapist. Instead of helping patients work toward a brighter future, I found myself preparing them for an unavoidable end.

  • Patients who couldn’t get their medications began losing hope.
  • Therapy alone wasn’t enough to keep their suicidal thoughts at bay.
  • They would ask me questions like, “What happens if I don’t wake up tomorrow?” or “What do I tell my family when I’m gone?”

I tried to hold space for their pain, but it felt like shouting into the void. I could no longer offer solutions because the system had taken them away. I had to prepare my patients for the unimaginable—for the reality that their lives weren’t deemed worth saving because saving money was more important.

This was not why I became a mental health professional.

A Broken System That Costs Lives

Insurance companies are supposed to make healthcare accessible. Instead, they’ve become gatekeepers that stand between patients and their right to live healthy, fulfilling lives. While insurance executives enjoy multi-million-dollar salaries, real people are left to suffer, deteriorate, and die.

Mental illness is already stigmatized enough. Patients often have to summon immense courage just to ask for help. To then be turned away because insurance won’t cover the cost of their care—it’s cruel and inhumane.

The consequences of these decisions are real:

  • Patients left untreated face higher rates of hospitalization, incarceration, and suicide.
  • Families are shattered by preventable losses.
  • Mental health professionals are left burnt out, demoralized, and hopeless.

This isn’t just a failure of healthcare—it’s a moral failing of our society. If we judge our society by how we treat our most vulnerable members, what does this say about America?

Why I Had to Walk Away

Retiring in 2020 was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever made. I loved my work. I loved my patients. However, I could no longer reconcile my role within a system that failed to value human life. Every denied prescription, every preventable death, chipped away at my faith in a profession I once believed could change lives for the better.

My decision to retire was not about giving up—it was about refusing to be complicit in a system that prioritizes profit over people. I couldn’t continue to watch patients die when I knew that their lives could have been saved.

We Deserve Better

Mental health care is healthcare. Full stop. And healthcare is a human right. No one should have to beg for the medications they need to survive. No one should lose their life because an insurance company decided they weren’t worth the cost.

If we want to create real change, we need to hold insurance companies accountable. We need to advocate for reforms that put patients first—not profits. And we need to treat mental health with the same urgency and compassion that we give to physical health.

Final Thoughts on Insurance Death Panels

To those still fighting within the system—patients, families, and fellow mental health professionals—know that your work matters. Your lives matter. You are not alone in this fight.

I may have retired, but I will never stop speaking out against the injustices I witnessed. I hope that by sharing my story, we can shine a light on the system’s brokenness and inspire meaningful change because saving lives must always come before saving money.

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health, don’t hesitate to seek help. Resources exist, and your life is worth fighting for.

Share Your Thoughts about Insurance Death Panels!

What do you think? Have you ever been denied lifesaving medications or care by an insurance death panel? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

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The Goddess

The Goddess White Buffalo Woman

Upon emerging from the Cave, the Goddess in the form of White Buffalo Woman appeared to Coyote.

“Tell me what you saw in the cavern,” White Buffalo Woman began.

Coyote described what he had seen. As he spoke, a smile spread on her face while the firelight danced in her eyes.
He told her of the fire with the mysterious backward-facing dancers. He described the masks they wore. He told her of the dream of being dismembered by the two-leggeds. He told her that when he had tried to escape, the opening was no longer there, but a new way had opened on the other side of the cave. When he had finished speaking, she stirred the fire with a sharp stick as she spoke in reply.

“The two-legged tribe is called the “People of the Ashes.” They went on a quest to find fire for themselves, and they were able to find it. But in their greed, they wanted to keep it for themselves. They forgot to return and share it with the rest of their tribe. They jealously guard the secret of their fire.

When they teach one of their tribe to make the fire, that person is sworn to secrecy on pain of death. They only teach other members of the tribe how to make the fire in secret rites and rituals, and they are not allowed to talk about it with people outside of their own tribe. That is why, when they saw you, they sought to tear you to shreds. They prize the fire, but they burn with jealousy at the thought of anyone else ever learning its secret. Because of this, their fire contains more heat than light.”

The Goddess

“They wear the masks because in their hearts they remember their other brothers and sisters that they left behind, and they secretly long to reconnect with them. The masks remind them of what they lost when they became greedy and wanted to keep the fire to themselves.

Yet the masks also blind them, so that they cannot see the way out of the cavern. It has been sealed to them forever out of their own blindness. The masks they wear to remind themselves of their four-legged brothers and sisters are the very things that keep them from finding their way back.”

“When first they saw that they could not escape the cavern, they began to dance backward, trying to re-trace their steps in order to find a way out. They forgot that the way forward does not lie in the past. By walking backward, they are merely re-living their past mistakes. They are caught in a spiral dance with no end, and they shall never escape until they are able to sacrifice their selfishness. When they are able to do so, they will cast aside their masks and the way will be open to them again.”

As she spoke, she leaned over and began to stroke the fur on Coyote’s head.

“You were sent this vision of your own death to remind you not to tread the path that they have chosen. When you entered the cave, you were full of self-doubt. You did not think that you would ever be able to complete your journey. The vision of your death has changed that about you, for once you have faced your own death, what else can stand in your way?”

Coyote puzzled over her words. She watched him struggling with these new ideas.

“Do you not yet understand?” She motioned for him to stand, “If you think you cannot complete your journey, you will be correct. But if you think you can complete your quest, then that wisdom will be the very thing that allows you to succeed.”

She guided him to a still pond nearby. Although the snow was falling all around, the pond’s surface had not yet frozen. She watched the sparkling moonlight reflecting from its surface and motioned for him to look into the water. “What do you see?” she asked.

He gazed into the glistening pool and saw a reflection of himself. His face was familiar to him and yet not familiar. In that face, he saw newfound wisdom. In his face, he saw knowledge and confidence, and he knew that her words were true. With a renewed sense of purpose, he determined to go on. He was now willing to face whatever might come.

He looked up as the Goddess White Buffalo Woman bid him farewell, and he continued on his journey.

Wisdom of the Goddess

“For she is the incarnation of the promise of perfection, the soul’s assurance that, at the conclusion of the exile in a world of organized inadequacies, the bliss that once was known will be known again…”

– Joseph Campbell, The Hero’s Journey

The Road of Trials is harsh. Even with the ability to call on our Supernatural Aid for assistance, conquering unknown lands can be taxing. It is the portion of the journey where we are leaving our old selves behind and discovering who our new selves might be. The difficult part of the Road of Trials is that while we already know from experience what doesn’t work, we may not yet know what does work. This trial-and-error process can lead to second-guessing and self-doubt on the road to spiritual enlightenment. This is why it is a perfect time for a little extra help from the supernatural in the form of the Meeting with the Goddess.

The Goddess here isn’t necessarily an actual divine entity, although she can be. Since the heroes in most of the myths Campbell studied were heterosexual males, the Meeting with the Goddess represents the ideal partner for a heterosexual male. Since we’re talking about a spiritual and metaphorical level here, the Meeting with the Goddess symbolizes the idea of completeness and perfection and not some actual physical entity.

After having our former identities stripped away in the Belly of the Whale, and after our Initiation in the Road of Trials, the Goddess appears to us in ideal form with the promise of what could be, if we persevere. The Goddess represents perfect love. It is a love that is truly unconditional; a love that applies not only to others but to self as well.

Share Your Thoughts on the Goddess!

Have you had your own metaphorical meeting with the Goddess? What wisdom does she impart? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

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The Mask of Anger

The mask of anger

At this time of year we like to dress up and often wear masks. But there are other kinds of mask that we sometimes wear to hide our emotions. One of these emotional masks is the mask of anger.

Anger is almost always a mask for deeper emotions. When we are angry, that anger is usually the result of failed attempts to express more positive emotions. These more positive emotions are two-sided. When we cannot express our love and concern for others in positive ways, anger is the result.

You may have heard that hate is the opposite of love. Anger and other forms of emotional aggression may sometimes be interpreted as hatred. But consider this: Have you ever been angry with someone or something you didn’t care about? If you didn’t care one way or another about how things turned out, would there be any reason to get angry about it?

The opposite of ‘love’ isn’t ‘hate.’ The opposite of ‘love’ isn’t ‘anger.’ The opposite of ‘love’ is ‘indifference.’ The opposite of ‘love’ is ‘apathy.’

This doesn’t mean that we can justify emotionally aggressive tendencies by saying that they are just expressions of how much we care. We don’t get to say, “I yell at you because I care about you.” If we truly care about others, we will reflect that intention in positive ways. If we really care about the people in our lives, we will express that care by learning to interact without emotional aggression.

Anger and other forms of emotional aggression are often hiding deeper emotions. These emotions, called primary emotions, are feelings that deal with our own vulnerability. If I am feeling insecure about a relationship, or about my own ability to cope, or if I am feeling abandoned or betrayed, I am in a vulnerable state.

Vulnerability is difficult to express openly because we are conditioned to believe that if we express such feelings then it is easier for others to take advantage of us. So when we are feeling vulnerable because of our own insecurities or fears, the tendency is to mask those feelings of vulnerability by acting out in emotionally aggressive ways. We’re taught to “suck it up,” or that “big boys don’t cry,” or that “you shouldn’t let him get to you.” So it’s natural to want to hide these emotions by masking them with anger.

Anger and emotional aggression are attempts to do something to fix the problem. Anger is Doing Mode. The first step in using mindfulness to manage our moods is to realize that we don’t have to ‘do’ anything in response to an emotional state. By shifting to Being Mode, it is possible to simply sit with the vulnerable emotions that led to the emotional aggression in the first place.

Always remember that there is no such thing as a ‘wrong’ feeling. Problems arise from how we choose to behave after the feeling. By consciously choosing to sit with those feelings of vulnerability and insecurity in Being Mode instead of believing that we have to act on them by ‘doing’ something to fix the problem, we use mindfulness to realize that feelings are simply feelings, and that they will eventually pass.

The most primitive parts of the brain are sometimes colloquially referred to as the reptilian brain. These are the parts of the brain that are only concerned with the four basic necessities of survival: Food, fighting, fleeing, and reproduction. Anger often leads to aggression because of the ‘fight or flight’ response of the reptilian brain. This part of the brain senses danger before the rational parts of the brain can kick in.

Imagine that one morning on the way to work you catch a glimpse of the garden hose out of the corner of your eye. Further suppose that in your haste to go about your morning routine, your brain doesn’t recognize it as the garden hose, but instead interprets it as a snake. The first thing that happens is that you have an automatic visceral reaction. Your ‘fight or flight’ response kicks in. You have a physiological response. You may gasp out loud, or freeze in place. This is the reptilian brain taking charge.

The next thing that happens is that your emotional brain kicks in. When this part of your brain is activated, you have an emotional response. In this case, you may experience a brief flash of fear.

Finally, the rational, thinking part of your brain is activated. You think, “Oh, that’s just the garden hose.”

Your rational response then defuses the ‘fight or flight’ response and you realize that there is no actual danger there.

What if that thinking part of your brain didn’t recognize it as a garden hose? Would you grab a hoe and bludgeon your garden hose to death? Would you rush to the car hoping to avoid the danger? Would you freeze in place?

Emotional aggression is the tendency to respond from the reptilian brain before the rational parts of the brain have had a chance to do their job.

Emotions like anger are usually visceral, reptilian brain responses, but with practice it is possible to learn that we don’t have to respond every time we feel an overpowering emotion. Learning to sit mindfully with an emotion, without responding or reacting to it, is living in the moment.

By learning to ‘wait out’ extreme emotional responses, we give our rational brains time to catch up and to then come up with positive solutions that don’t require aggressive responses.

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The 7Cs – Compassion

Pride Month

“If your compassion does not include yourself it is incomplete.” – Jack Kornfield

People who have difficulties with emotional aggression are generally people who care deeply about the people in their lives. They have the capacity to be very caring and compassionate people. Their emotional aggression is often the result of attempting to express their compassion in maladaptive ways. If you didn’t care about people, would there be any need to get all worked up in the first place? Would there be any need to act in emotionally aggressive ways about people you didn’t care about?

This is because the opposite of “compassion” isn’t anger or conflict. The opposite of compassion is apathy. If you didn’t care, there’d be nothing to be upset about.

Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy is about learning to channel that passion in compassionate and productive ways rather than in destructive and emotionally aggressive ways. We do this by learning to focus on relationships in a compassionate way.

As Jack Kornfield reminds us, if our compassion does not include ourselves, then our compassion is incomplete. Being compassionate means learning to also be gentle with ourselves by realizing that we are entitled to make mistakes. Mistakes are opportunities for growth and learning. In fact, I’d go as far as to say that if you didn’t make mistakes, you’d never learn anything, because if you never made a mistake, it meant that you already knew what you were doing in the first place.

Compassion with Self and Others

To be compassionate with yourself as well as with others, learn to view mistakes as opportunities for growth rather than as opportunities to beat yourself (or others) up. When you make a mistake, focus on your intention in the situation. If, for example, your intention is to have a compassionate relationship with someone, but you make a mistake that doesn’t reflect that intention, regroup and try again. Return to your intention in the situation, apologize if necessary, correct the mistake if possible, learn from it, and continue in a more compassionate fashion.

The idea behind using Meme Triads is to move from a problem-focused paradigm to a solution-focused paradigm. One of the goals of Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy is to begin to think in terms of solutions instead of in terms of problems. When we start thinking in terms of solutions, we begin to live with intention. We begin to live with compassion.

The power of intention is one of the skills of mindfulness, so by living deliberately and with intention, we move to a solution-focused paradigm.

Since emotional aggression is the result of maladaptive attempts to be compassionate with others, half of the battle is already won! If we weren’t concerned about the other people in our lives, we wouldn’t care how they felt, or how we felt after interacting with them. So the element of care and concern for others is already present when we act out of emotional aggression.

When we behave in emotionally aggressive ways, we are doing it because we care. It’s just that the way we have chosen to express that care and concern is actually having the opposite effect of the way we intended it. Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy is a way to learn to express care and concern in positive ways rather than in ways that focus on the negatives.

The ultimate goal of Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy is take the care and concern we feel for others and to focus on the positive by expressing that love in compassionate, rather than aggressive, ways. When we learn to do so without assumption and without judgment for self or others, we will have taken a giant step forward towards living fully in True Self.

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Peer-Reviewers Wanted for New Journal

Mindfulness for Therapists

In 2024 the Mindful Ecotherapy Center, LLC will begin publishing the Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy Journal. This journal will be specific to research in the field of Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy.

As a part of this process we will be looking for peer reviewers to serve on the publication panel for the journal.

If you are a credentialed mental health professional or educator interested in serving on this panel in a volunteer capacity, please complete the form below.

No Fields Found.
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FREE Course: Ethics of Ecotherapy

In our ongoing effort to improve the quality of the courses we offer, we will be applying to the National Board for Certified Counselors (NBCC) to be able to provide LIVE continuing education opportunities in addition to our online offerings.

As part of this process we are offering this FREE two-hour course on Ethics in Ecotherapy in June of 2023!

This course will cover some ethics issues common to the practice of ecotherapy. In addition to two free hours of continuing education on the Ethics of Ecotherapy, participants will receive a coupon code good for $25 off any course offered by the Mindful Ecotherapy Center, LLC.

This course will be conducted by Zoom, so you will need access to Zoom for the course.

Course Description

Ecotherapy usually includes doing therapy outdoors. Therapy in non-traditional settings presents unique ethical challenges. These ethical issues are usually not covered in therapy graduate school programs. In this course we will discuss how to address some common ethical issues for therapists and counselors that are unique to the process of ecotherapy.  

Course Objectives

After taking this course the student will be able to:

  • Discuss and describe confidentiality and informed consent issues common to the practice of ecotherapy
  • Discuss training recommendations regarding the practice of ecotherapy
  • Discuss assessment and client safety issues common to the practice of ecotherapy
  • Discuss and describe what constitutes dual relationships in ecotherapy
  • Discuss and describe values conflicts in ecotherapy settings
  • Develop a sense of self-awareness for counselors and therapists practicing ecotherapy  

Course Instructions

This is a LIVE course that will be offered on Tuesday, June 20, 2023 at 10 a.m. Pacific Daylight Savings Time. An email reminder containing the Zoom code to access the course will be sent the day before the conference. The conference will be presented on Zoom. You need to be present for the duration of the course to get course credit.

The course will be two hours on Zoom. At the end of the course you will have access to a link for the final exam.

Upon successful completion of the exam you will receive a Certificate of Completion in pdf format, and you will be emailed a coupon code good for $25 off any course offered by the Mindful Ecotherapy Center, LLC.

You may register for this FREE course any time prior to June 20, 2023. If you do not pre-register before the date, we cannot guarantee a seat for the course, so please register as early as possible! You may find help registering for courses and accessing course materials by visiting the Help Center.

CLICK HERE TO REGISTER FOR THIS FREE COURSE

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Being One-Mindful

strawberries

I love strawberries. I can nibble on them all day long. There have been times when I have been engaged in other activities while eating strawberries. I may be sitting at the computer, typing away, blissfully chewing strawberries.

As I munch away, with my attention on the computer and not on the strawberries, I am sometimes surprised and disappointed when I reach into the bowl in a mindfulness fashion only to realize that I have eaten the last one.

On those occasions when I’ve eaten the last strawberry without realizing that it was the last one, the thought that came to mind was, “If I had known that I was eating the last one, I would have enjoyed it more!”

What is it about knowing that I’m about to eat the last strawberry that makes eating it more enjoyable? That particular strawberry isn’t going to taste any different from the rest of the ones in the bowl. What makes the experience of the last strawberry different and more enjoyable is the fact that I have focused all of my attention on enjoying it, because it is the last one.

What if we could learn to make every strawberry the last one?

Singer/songwriter Ray Charles once said, “Live every day as if it will be your last, because one of these days, you’re going to be right.”

What if you knew that today would be your last day on Earth? What would you do differently? How would you respond to those around you? What would you say to your loved ones? Would you treat them any differently if you knew that this might be the last time you would ever see them? What would be different about your to do list? Would your priorities change if you knew that this was your last day?

Looking at your life from this perspective tends to help you focus on what’s really important. If you could really live up to the idea that today may be your last day on Earth, it would probably cause you to slow down and enjoy each experience that comes your way. Each day could be the last strawberry.

The ability to do this is what practitioners of Mindfulness call Mindful Awareness. Mindful Awareness is the skill of focusing on one thing at a time. It is the ability to make each strawberry the last strawberry. It is also the ability to enjoy each day of our lives as if it were the last one. Mindful Awareness teaches us that the way to live every day as if it will be your last, is to focus on the moment, savoring every bit of every experience the world has to offer.

(Kabat-Zinn, 1994, p. 4) identifies three major components of mindfulness. These are:

  1. “On purpose” or intention,
  2. “Paying attention” or attention,
  3. “In a particular way” or attitude (mindfulness qualities

These components may be summed up as focusing on one thing at a time or being one-mindful.

By intentionally paying attention in a particular way (i.e., mindfully), we are able to focus only on the experience that is before us, without judgments or expectations. We are also able to approach the situation without assumptions by focusing only on the experience itself.

According to Shapiro, et al (2006), “In the context of mindfulness practice, paying attention involves observing the operations of one’s moment-to moment, internal and external experience. This is what Husserl refers to as a “return to things themselves,” that is, suspending all the ways of interpreting experience and attending to experience itself, as it presents itself in the here and now. In this way, one learns to attend to the contents of consciousness, moment by moment.”

By focusing on one thing at a time, we also place ourselves in the present moment, and take ourselves out of thoughts about the past or the future. In this way, we avoid the temptation to interpret the experience based on what has gone before or what may come in the future. The experience simply is what it is, with no interpretation required.

Kabat-Zinn, J. (1994). Wherever you go, there you are: Mindfulness meditation in everyday life. New York: Hyperion

Shapiro SL, Carlson LE, Astin JA, Freedman B. Mechanisms of mindfulness. J Clin Psychol. 2006 Mar;62(3):373-86. doi: 10.1002/jclp.20237. PMID: 16385481.

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Automatic Thinking

Learning to drive an automobile can be an overwhelming task. You have to focus on keeping the vehicle between the lines on the highway while watching for other cars, traffic signals and road signs. In addition to all of this, you must constantly glance at the speedometer to make sure that you are driving at a safe speed. You cannot look at the speedometer for too long because you must also concentrate on what may be happening on the highway. When learning to drive, you probably recited the ‘rules of the road’ to yourself over and over while driving (“Hands at two and ten,” “Watch out for animals and children running into the road,” etc.).

But as you gained knowledge and experience of driving, it became more and more of an automatic process. It may have become so automatic that now from time to time you make a routine drive without remembering anything about it. If you have ever let your mind wander and have missed an exit or a turn, then you are fully familiar with the process of automatization.

The process of automatization occurs in many areas of our lives. Just as the process of driving eventually becomes automatic, and can occur without our conscious awareness, so can thought and feeling processes become automatized.

If you have ever had a strong emotional reaction to a situation without knowing why, it is possible that one of your automatized emotional processes was activated (Moulds & Bryant, 2004).

Mindfulness is just the opposite of this automatic pilot experience. It is a way of paying close attention to your immediate experiences without getting lost in thought or shifting into automatic patterns of thinking or behaving. It is a shift from Doing Mode into Being Mode.

Doing Mode

Think about your morning routine. When you were in the shower this morning, were you actually ‘in’ the shower, or was your mind racing down the highway to your day-to-day errands? When you were there in the shower, were you feeling the warmth of the water on your skin, smelling the fragrance of the soap, and hearing the sound of the water, or was your mind elsewhere?

When we are preoccupied with thoughts of the past or the future, or with thoughts of getting things done, we are in Doing Mode. Doing Mode can also be expressed as Thinking Mode, because to get things done, we generally have to think about those things first. We make ‘to do’ lists in our minds and then do them in Doing Mode.

Thinking Mode takes us away from experiencing the world directly with our senses. When we leave Thinking Mode, and focus our awareness directly on the information provided by our senses, we have entered Sensing Mode.

Mindful Awareness teaches us to focus on the world experienced directly by our senses: touch, taste, smell, hearing, and sight. Experiencing life in sensing mode introduces us to a richer world. It’s impossible to be bored or apathetic if you treat each experience as if it is happening to you for the first time. Approaching each new situation without any assumptions or expectations is referred to as Beginner’s Mind, or sometimes as Child’s Mind.

Being Mode

Williams (2008) presents research that indicates the benefits of mindful states of being. Mindfulness is associated with decreases in levels of rumination (a process of becoming ‘trapped’ in negative thought cycles), avoidance (refusing to accept the reality of a given situation), perfectionism (attempts to control a situation), and maladaptive self-guides (attempting solutions that maintain the problem). Taken together, this reduction in negative thought and behavior patterns form what is known as Being Mode.

By focusing on the present moment, we leave Thinking Mode and enter into Sensing Mode.

In Sensing Mode, we simply allow ourselves to become fully aware of what is going on around us and within us, without attempting to control or manipulate these events and sensations. Being Mode reduces ruminations by allowing us to become aware of our thoughts and feelings as internal processes that we can choose to participate in, or choose to simply observe. In Being Mode we learn that we are not our thoughts.

In Western modes of thought, we are taught that our thoughts and feelings are our identities. Descartes said, “I think, therefore I am,” but does that mean that if you stop thinking, you cease to exist?

Being Mode allows us to detach from our cognitive and emotional processes and observe them, or stop them, if we so choose.

Being Mode reduces avoidance by allowing us to be in the present moment. If you are trying to avoid an unpleasant emotional state, you set up a cycle of denial. This denial creates anxiety and stress, which leads to more unpleasant emotional states to be avoided, which starts the avoidance cycle all over again. Being Mode allows us to participate in the unpleasant situation without internalizing it; i.e., without allowing the unpleasantness to become a part of our identity.

Perfectionism can be seen as a control mechanism. It is a displacement technique. If we feel out of control of certain areas of our lives, and we feel powerless to change those areas, we may displace our attention on the areas that we can control. By engaging in compulsive, perfectionist behaviors we assert our control over tangible areas as a substitute for areas over which we may feel we have no control. The idea of “perfection” becomes an obsessive means of anxiety management.

Being Mode allows us to realize that perfection is a subjective ideal. For example, if I asked you to describe your “perfect” day, you are likely to give me a totally different answer to that question than I would give if I were asked the same question.

Since our answers to the question, “What is your idea of the perfect day?” would not be identical, there is no objective definition to the word “perfect.” Being Mode helps one to realize that perfection is a self-defined concept.

In Being Mode we learn that every moment is perfect in and of itself, if we allow it to be.

Finally, Being Mode allows us to disengage from our own cognitive and emotional processes for a time. By doing so, we can become objective observers of our own inner states, without feeling that we must participate in them. Being Mode is a type of metacognition, or “thinking about thinking.” By observing the thoughts and feelings that have led to maladaptive consequences, we gain the ability to change those thought and feeling processes to lead to more productive conclusions.

Moulds, M. L. & Bryant, R. A. (2004). Automatic Versus Effortful Influences in the Processing of Traumatic Material in Acute Stress Disorder. Journal of Cognitive Therapy and Research, Vol. 28, No. 6, December 2004, pp. 805–817.

Williams, G. (2008). Mindfulness, Depression and Modes of Mind. Journal of Cognitive Therapy and Research, Vol. 32, No. 6, December, 2008. Pages 721-733.