Tag: mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy

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Completeness and Perfection

completeness and perfection

We all long for completeness and perfection to some extent. Every human being on the planet has also experienced occasional feelings of shame, guilt, blame, or inferiority. Such feelings are a natural part of the human condition. They are the source of many of the problems we experience with our relationships, careers, spiritual endeavors, and day-to-day living.

As human beings, we’re conditioned to disown certain parts of ourselves. We don’t like to admit our feelings of shame or guilt, because doing so might mean that we are less than perfect. But how do we define “completeness and perfection?”

Try this sometime. Ask three of your closest friends or family members what their idea of the “perfect day” is. I’m willing to bet you’ll get at least three different answers. So if you do get three different answers to the question, “Describe your perfect day,” what does “completeness and perfection” really mean?

The obvious answer to this is that the term “perfect” is defined by the individual. This means that your idea of completeness and perfection might be completely different from my own. Each of us is in charge of defining what “perfect” means to us.

The good news about this is that if “completeness and perfection” are self-defined, and if my own personal idea of what “perfect” means is causing me stress, then I am free to change it at any time. The way to do this is to realize that all of us have feelings of depression, stress, or anxiety from time to time. All of us fail to live up to our own expectations for ourselves from time to time. We all have our moments of self-doubt. When this happens, we may choose to beat ourselves up for failing to be “perfect,” or we may choose to realize that as human beings, failing to be “perfect” is a natural part of existence.

By learning to love ourselves “warts and all,” we learn the art of radical acceptance of the True Self.

The psychotherapist Carl Jung believed that all human beings contain within them the potential for all behaviors, both “good” and “bad.” According to Jung, the Persona is the mask we wear in our everyday lives. It is the face we present to others. The Persona represents who we think we are, and who we would like to be. The Shadow, on the other hand, represents all those traits we wish to suppress in ourselves. All our anger, fears, and negative emotions and behaviors are pushed down into the unconscious world of the Shadow and denied expression in the Persona.

Jung believed that the key to mental health was a process called individuation. Individuation involves striking a balance between the Shadow and the Persona. The Shadow represents the forces of chaos and darkness within an individual, and the Persona represents the forces of order and light.

While the Shadow contains all of our darker and more negative emotions, it is also the seat of creativity. To deny the existence of one’s Shadow is to deny one’s own ability to be creative. However, allowing the Shadow to rule one’s life creates a situation where the individual is ruled by the forces of chaos and darkness. Jung saw psychoanalysis as the process by which we balance light and darkness within ourselves, thus achieving individuation.

Some moral, religious, and ethical systems try to deny the existence of our darker impulses. These systems focus solely on the Persona. This is the face we present to others. The more such systems of thought and belief suppress the darker impulses in the Shadow, the more unbalanced the individual becomes. In such a case, the Shadow becomes a pressure cooker with no means to release the pressure. In extreme cases, the pressure cooker blows, leading to dysfunction and even psychosis.

Ecospirituality recognizes the need to balance Persona and Shadow. By acknowledging our darker impulses, we open the door to creating this balance, leading to individuation. Many people think that acknowledging our darker impulses means having to act on these impulses. Nothing could be further from the truth. This is one of the misconceptions people often have in their quest for completeness and perfection.

Suppose someone has done something that leads you to be angry with that person. Your first impulse might be the desire to retaliate in some way by returning anger for anger, or by hurting that individual in some way. Those who focus only on the Persona would attempt to suppress and deny this impulse, even though the desire to retaliate is a perfectly normal reaction to being angered. The angrier such a person becomes, the more he tries to suppress that anger until he reaches boiling point and reacts explosively to the situation.

In Ecospirituality, we seek to restore balance by acknowledging this impulse. Instead of swallowing our anger, we would recognize it as a darker impulse. But instead of returning anger for anger, we strive to express that anger in positive ways; perhaps by confronting the source of the anger and saying to the person, “You know, I really felt angry when you _. I don’t want to be angry with you. What can we do to resolve this situation?”

In this way, we are able to acknowledge the anger in constructive, rather than destructive, ways. The anger itself is not “bad;” it is merely a catalyst. It’s up to us to choose what to do with it. Expressing anger in positive ways is one way to achieve completeness and perfection.

When we are able to master this, we will come to the realization that completeness and perfection are self-defined, and since we’re the ones doing the defining, we get to say when we’ve achieved it.

Share Your Thoughts on Completeness and Perfection!

What do completeness and perfection mean to you? Are you able to define the terms for yourself? Share your thoughts in the comments below!


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New Hosting Service Coming Soon!

New hosting service coming soon

The Mindful Ecotherapy Center, LLC is excited to announce a significant change that will enhance the overall experience of our clients and students: we are switching to a new hosting service. This decision marks an important step toward ensuring the quality, security, and reliability of our online courses and other digital offerings. In today’s increasingly online world, the platforms we use to deliver content are as important as the content itself, and we believe this transition will benefit everyone who interacts with our services.

Why We’re Making the Change

The primary reason for switching hosting providers is to improve the quality of our clients’ online experience. As our center has grown, so has our community of users who rely on our courses and resources for professional development, personal growth, and continuing education. While our previous hosting service served us well for many years, we began to notice some challenges as our client base expanded. Some of you may have experienced difficulties logging in or difficulties downloading materials. With our new hosting service such difficulties should be a thing of the past.

Increased Demand on the Platform

Our online courses, webinars, and digital products have seen a significant rise in demand, with more students enrolling each year. This rapid growth placed increased pressure on our existing hosting infrastructure, resulting in slower load times and occasional technical glitches. As we strive to provide a smooth, stress-free learning environment, we knew we needed a more robust hosting service to keep up with the increasing demand.

Security Concerns

In the age of cyber threats, ensuring the security of our clients’ data is paramount. Although we pride ourselves on the fact that since we were founded in 2007 we’ve never had a security breach, our new hosting service will provide extra security. Our former hosting platform was secure, but we realized the need for more advanced protection as new security risks emerged. Sensitive information, such as client login details, payment data, and personal progress reports, must be protected with the latest security protocols. The new hosting service will offer enhanced encryption and additional security layers, ensuring that all transactions and personal data are as safe as possible.

Technical Support and Reliability

Reliable and efficient technical support is essential, especially when our students depend on us for timely assistance during their learning journeys. Although our previous hosting provider offered some technical support, response times were not always as fast as we would have liked. In contrast, our new hosting service has a reputation for exceptional customer support, with 24/7 availability and a team that is dedicated to resolving issues quickly. This means our clients will experience fewer disruptions and quicker resolutions if problems arise.

The Benefits of the New Hosting Service

We carefully selected our new hosting provider to offer key improvements in several areas, and we’re confident that these changes will translate to a better experience for all users of the Mindful Ecotherapy Center’s digital resources.

Improved Performance and Speed

One of the most noticeable benefits of the new hosting service will be improved performance. Faster load times and more efficient course delivery will enhance the user experience, particularly for those accessing courses on mobile devices or slower internet connections. This upgrade will ensure that all users can access our content seamlessly, whether they are downloading course materials, watching videos, or participating in live webinars.

Enhanced Security Features

The new hosting provider is equipped with cutting-edge security protocols, including advanced firewalls, secure socket layer (SSL) encryption, and frequent security audits. These measures will safeguard client data from hacking attempts and unauthorized access. Additionally, our new provider offers secure payment gateways, adding another layer of protection for those purchasing our courses or other products.

Scalability for Future Growth

Our new hosting service is designed to scale with us as we continue to grow. Whether we add new courses, integrate new technologies like virtual classrooms, or expand our offerings, this hosting provider will allow us to do so seamlessly. This means we won’t outgrow our platform anytime soon, and we can focus on expanding the quality of our services without worrying about technical limitations.

Improved User Interface and Accessibility

The platform we’ve chosen offers a more intuitive user interface, making it easier for clients to navigate the site and access the resources they need. We’ll be improving site navigation until the first of the year, making it easier to find what you’re looking for. Whether you’re enrolling in a new course, tracking your progress, or downloading materials, the experience will be smoother and more user-friendly. Additionally, the new hosting service offers enhanced accessibility features, ensuring that our courses are easy to use for individuals with disabilities or those who rely on assistive technology.

What This Means for You

For our current students and clients, the transition to the new hosting platform will be smooth and seamless. We’ve worked closely with the new provider to ensure that no data or progress will be lost during the transition, and you will not need to re-register or recreate your accounts. You can continue accessing your courses as usual, and any changes will be communicated clearly through email and our website. There may be brief outages during low-traffic times, but these will be announced in the blog should they occur.

In terms of user experience, you can expect faster load times, better security, and improved reliability. Our goal is to make your learning journey as enjoyable and stress-free as possible, and we believe this new hosting service will help us achieve that goal.

Looking Ahead

This switch to a new hosting service is just one part of our ongoing efforts to enhance the Mindful Ecotherapy Center’s offerings. As we look ahead, we are committed to continuing our tradition of providing high-quality, accessible education and resources in the field of mindful ecotherapy. Whether you’re a returning student or new to our center, we’re confident that the improvements to our platform will enrich your learning experience.

Thank you for your continued support as we make this transition. We’re excited about the opportunities this new hosting service will provide, and we look forward to growing with you in the years to come.

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Mindfulness and Ecospirituality

Mindfulness and Ecospirituality

Mindfulness and ecospirituality go hand-in-hand. Ecospirituality is the “what” and mindfulness is the “how.” This quote from Black Elk explains one perspective on this relationship:

“You have noticed that everything an Indian does is in a circle, and that is because the Power of the World always works in circles, and everything tries to be round. The sky is round, and I have heard that the earth is round like a ball, and so are all the stars. The wind, in its greatest power, whirls. Birds make their nest in circles, for theirs is the same religion as ours. Even the seasons form a great circle in their changing and always come back again to where they were. The life of a man is a circle from childhood to childhood, and so it is in everything where power moves.”

–Black Elk, Oglala Shaman (1853-1950)

For hundreds of centuries prior to the Industrial Revolution, people lived together in small tribes, whether in nomadic bands or geographically fixed in locations in villages or towns. Evolution wired our brains for nature. But with the advent of agriculture, we settled down more and more, and built cities. With cities came modernization. First, we built machines, then, with the discovery of electricity, we began to build electric machines. Thomas Edison’s invention of electric light forever robbed the night of its power to evoke mystery and terror by creating a perpetual electric twilight in our towns and cities, making more hours available to labor in the factories. The more domesticated we became, the more the wilderness retreated beyond the city limits. We ceased to mark time by the cycles of the seasons and began to keep time by the factory whistle.

Our modern, mechanized lifestyle has brought about many changes for the better. We live longer and more productive lives, but our hearts still long for the cry of nature. Our minds retreated from nature, but our bodies did not. Evolution programmed us to need nature, and our bodies and minds still respond to it.

What is the relationship between mindfulness and ecospirituality? Ecopsychology studies the relationship between mental health and the environment. This field of research views the mental health of humankind as a part of the geo-ecosystem that is the living planet we call Earth. If all life on Earth is interrelated, and human beings certainly are a type of life on Earth, then what happens to the rest of the planet affects us all. Ecopsychology recognizes that not only does the environment impact our physical health, but it also has a direct influence on our mental health. While artificial, stressful, polluted environments have the power to harm, nature has the power to heal, both physically and mentally.

From the perspective of ecopsychology, everything is connected to everything else. According to this paradigm, people don’t exist in a vacuum. They are part of the larger system of their neighborhood, of the even larger system of their particular societies, and ultimately the system of all life on Earth, circles-within-circles. Each of these systems communicates to us in different ways, and we interact with each of these systems. The individual is not only a part of a system of interacting human beings but also a part of an ecosystem. We interact with the environment, and the environment interacts with us. For those who know how to listen, the wind in the trees can sing. The view of a mountain range or a moonlit ocean can tell a story. The smell of the first flowers of spring can speak just as clearly as a loved one’s voice can. The touch of a ray of sun can be as powerful as a lover’s caress.

On the other hand, a crowded, polluted city street can communicate as well. The messages we get from our environment have an impact on us, whether or not we are consciously aware of that impact. This environmental impact changes our sense of self and our sense of well-being. If we could make a paradigm shift to a lifestyle that makes room for nature, what would that do to our sense of well-being?

Mindfulness and Ecospirituality: A Paradigm Shift

Such a change involves seeking inspiration (or spirituality) from the natural world. It is a solution-focused approach. It’s easy to go into panic mode when we realize what we’re doing to the environment, but such stress and anxiety don’t do anything to solve the problem. A solution-focused approach helps us to find positive solutions rather than getting stuck in ruminations about the negative effects we’re having on the environment. It’s easy to get caught up in the doom and gloom, but that doesn’t solve anything. What’s needed is an intentional approach that works.

Such an approach to saving the environment means a grassroots, bottom-up approach. It starts with the individual. The most effective way to change a society or a culture is mindfully, one person at a time, through ecospirituality. Ecospirituality is about spiritual connections to nature, to your own higher power if you have one, to others, and to your own sense of True Self. Nature is the catalyst for such connections, and mindfulness is the pathway.

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NEW COURSE! Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy in Clinical Practice

Case Presnetation Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy (MBE) in Clinical Practice Online Home Study Course
PURCHASE THIS COURSE

Course Description

This Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy in Clinical Practice Course is one of three courses required for certification as a Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapist, as well as a stand-alone course for those interested in integrating the skills of Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy into their own practice.

The three courses required for certification as a Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapist are:

If you are interested in certification, you may purchase the courses individually, or purchase the Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy Therapist Certification Program Package at a savings of over 20%.

Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy in Clinical Practice offers a coherent framework for integrating mindfulness and nature-based interventions into your own therapeutic work. By following the guidance and utilizing the tools provided in this course, mental health professionals can enhance their practice, providing clients with a holistic approach to healing and well-being. Whether you are new to mindfulness and ecotherapy or looking to deepen your existing practice, this course is a comprehensive resource that can guide your journey toward incorporating these powerful techniques into your clinical practice.

This course provides a comprehensive guide to Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy that integrates mindfulness practices with nature-based therapy techniques, offering insights and practical tools for mental health professionals looking to enrich their therapeutic approaches with mindfulness and ecotherapy. Here is a step-by-step guide on how to effectively use this resource in your clinical practice.

Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy (MBE) is a therapeutic approach that combines traditional mindfulness practices with ecotherapy, which involves interacting with nature to promote mental well-being. MBE is rooted in the principles of mindfulness, which is the practice of being fully present and aware of the moment without judgment, and ecotherapy, which is the therapeutic use of nature and outdoor settings as a context for healing and personal growth.

Mindfulness-Based Ecotherapy in Clinical Practice offers a coherent framework for integrating mindfulness and nature-based interventions into your clinical work. By following the guidance and utilizing the tools provided in this course, mental health professionals can enhance their practice, providing clients with a holistic approach to healing and well-being. Whether you are new to mindfulness and ecotherapy or looking to deepen your existing practice, this course is a comprehensive resource that can guide your journey toward incorporating these powerful techniques into your clinical practice.

COURSE INFORMATION PACKET

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Dark Green Religion

Plant A Dark Green Religion - Treebeard

“Empirical studies have begun to demonstrate that many people in advanced industrial cultures resonate deeply with what could be called nature spirituality or nature religion. Some of these people view the world as full of spiritual intelligences with whom one can be in relationship (an animistic perception), while others among them perceive the earth to be alive or even divine (a more pantheistic belief).”

–Bron Taylor, Dark Green Religion

As the human race has become increasingly urbanized, we have come to spend less and less time in natural settings. Many of us now live in cities. Even so, we still hear the calls of nature. The wildness cries out to something in our blood. Although the Industrial Revolution has forced us into an urban way of living, we were creatures of the wilderness for millennia before that. Evolution has hardwired our brains for the woods.

Bron Taylor is a professor of religion and nature, environmental ethics, and environmental studies, at the University of Florida. He coined the term “dark green religion” and is the author of a book by that name. According to his book, a dark green religion is one that has a set of beliefs and practices characterized by a central conviction that “nature is sacred, has intrinsic value, and is therefore due reverent care.”

The central theme of Taylor’s book is that the people involved in ecological awareness and the green movement display many of the characteristics usually associated with a religious or spiritual movement. Both are characterized by deeply-held beliefs about the nature of reality and our relationship with it. Both have ethical systems of behavior, and “prophets” who outline and discuss these ethical standards. Taylor cites Henry David Thoreau’s Walden and Rachel Carson’s Silent Spring as examples of “sacred texts” used by this Dark Green Religion.

Taylor differentiates between green religion and dark green religion. To him, traditional world religions that have added ecological practices into their worship services and holiday observations are green religions, but not dark green religions. So if you go to a church that recycles, or a temple that has a carpooling club, or a mosque that uses LED lighting, you may be partaking of green religion without becoming involved in a dark green religion. According to Taylor, the “dark green” part of dark green religion refers to what Arne Naess called deep ecology.

Dark Green Religion and Deep Ecology

Arne Naess was a Norwegian philosopher and founder of the Deep Ecology movement. He cited Rachel Carson’s book Silent Spring as instrumental in his development of the philosophy of deep ecology, which states that humans are not privileged above other living things and that all living things should be treated with equal respect and ethical consideration. Naess believed that all things have an equal right to thrive and to survive. This is similar to the Gaia Hypothesis.

Although NASA scientist James Lovelock is credited with creating the Gaia hypothesis, which says that the Earth herself is a living thing, and we are all a part of the much larger organism that is Gaia, the Earth, Native Americans had such a concept for thousands of years before Lovelock came along. The Oglala Medicine Man and Shaman, Black Elk, once said, “The first peace, which is the most important, is that which comes within the souls of people when they realize their relationship, their oneness with the universe and all its powers, and when they realize at the center of the universe dwells the Great Spirit, and that its center is really everywhere, it is within each of us.”

The scientists have discovered what the Native Americans knew all along: That the Earth is a living organism and that we are all a part of the web of life. We are all connected. This idea of the interconnectedness of all things is what Naess meant by “deep ecology,” and deep ecology pursued with a reverent and sacred attitude is what Taylor means by a “dark green religion.” A tenet of this dark green religion is that if we are all connected, then what we do to the web of life, we do to ourselves as well. If we poison the water, then we drink the water, we take the poison into ourselves. If we pollute the food with pesticides, then eat the food, we take the pesticides into our own bodies. If we pollute the air, then breathe in the air, we take our own pollutants into our lungs. If we fatten our beef animals with hormones, then eat the beef, we take the hormones into ourselves. If we poison the minds and souls of our neighbors with hatred, anger, and bitterness, then interact with those neighbors in negative ways, we take the hatred, anger and bitterness into ourselves as well.

The deep ecology of a dark green religion teaches us to be one with nature. This is true even if we are agnostic or atheist. We don’t have to believe in supernatural beings in order to realize that nature is something larger and more transcendent than ourselves. The divinity in a dark green religion is nature herself. This is true whether or not we choose to personify nature as a separate supernatural and divine entity. We are all interdependent, and a dark green religion teaches us that if we cannot live in a sustainable, ecological way, then the human race will have no future. This planet has limited resources, and we don’t have anywhere else to go. Eventually everything will run out, and when this happens, how will we survive? The only way that the human race can survive is to embrace a way of life that honors all life on the planet. Such a way of life is what Taylor means by a dark green religion.

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The Tombstone Test

The Tombstone Test - living with confidence in True Self

The Tombstone Test can help you to live with confidence in your True Self. Your True Self is the person you would be if you were always living up to your best aspirations for yourself. It probably goes without saying that if you are living fully in your True Self, that you have a good sense of self-identity. True Self is who you would be if you could ‘get out of your own way.’ A life in True Self is a life with a sense of purpose and meaning.

Note that if you are living a life of purpose and meaning in a mindful way, you are living a life whose meaning you chose for yourself. Nobody else can assign your life meaning. Each person must choose their own reasons for living. Sometimes emotional aggression comes from allowing others to create our life purpose for us instead of doing it ourselves. Living in True Self in this case is taking back responsibility for our own destiny.

Confidence in True Self means having a good sense of self-identity. Confidence also means having the courage to avoid acts of emotional aggression. One way to do this is to realize that nobody else can ever tell us who we are or what we should be unless we give them that power, and there is no need to ever give anyone else that power.

Confidence and the Tombstone Test

I’m a history buff, so I can often be found looking at old buildings or roaming around in cemeteries. One day I was out in a particularly old cemetery doing some genealogical research when I started noticing the epitaphs. They all had something in common: There weren’t any that said, “Here lies Joe Smith. He had a two-story, five-bedroom house and a luxury car.”

Most of the tombstones I read there in the cemetery talked about how much the departed was loved and how much he or she would be missed. As I sat there reading all those tombstones full of kind words about the departed, I devised the Tombstone Test. The premise behind the Tombstone Test is to imagine yourself lying in your deathbed, looking back on your life. If you were doing that now, could you say you were truly happy with the way you lived?

The Tombstone Test will help you to clarify what your life means to you. When you are able to figure out your purpose in life you will be able to live confidently. You will be able to live a life of meaning from your True Self.

Imagine that you are lying on your deathbed, looking back on your life. What would you like to have written on your tombstone? What sort of legacy would you like to leave behind for your loved ones? The answers to these questions help you to determine your life’s meaning and purpose. When you have a purpose for your life, you are using the power of intention to live more fully in True Self as the person you were meant to be.

If you were on your deathbed looking back on your life, what would you like the overall theme of your life to be? What was your life’s meaning and purpose?

Think about some of the things that in the past have stressed you out and led you to act in emotionally aggressive ways. Now imagine that you are viewing these things from the perspective of someone who is looking back on their life. How important are those things from such a viewpoint? What could you change about the way you respond to such circumstances so that you could live a life of purpose in the future?

If your friends and family were going to give a eulogy at your funeral, what would you like them to say about you and the meaning of your life?

Imagine you could write out, in two or three paragraphs, your reason for being born and your purpose for living. What would you say in those paragraphs?

Think about your answers to these questions. Did the Tombstone Test give you the confidence to live more fully in your True Self?

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Memories: Making the Pieces Fit

memories

There are many types of memory. Let’s talk about two of them: Implicit Memory and Narrative Memory. Implicit memories are memories about specific events. What did you have for breakfast this morning? What outfit did you wear yesterday? Which people did you talk to today? The answers to these questions are implicit memories.

Narrative memories are memories that try to make sense of our various experiences on a day-to-day basis. Narrative memories integrate our implicit memories into a coherent whole. While implicit memories are the ‘what,’ narrative memories are the ‘why.’ Suppose I don’t usually eat eggs for breakfast, but today I decided to have scrambled eggs. The memory of having scrambled eggs is an implicit memory that answers the question, “What did I have for breakfast?” Further suppose that I was having breakfast with a friend who knew my eating habits, and my friend commented that I don’t usually eat eggs. If I search my own mind for a reason why I chose eggs for breakfast on this particular day, the reason I come up with will be the ‘why’ of narrative memory.

Our lives are made up of implicit memories of our daily events. In order to make sense of our lives, we link these events together in a narrative that gives our lives meaning. These stories that we create about our life experiences are our narrative memories. We all write our own autobiographies every day of our lives. This process of autobiography writing is our narrative memory fitting the pieces of our implicit memories together like a jigsaw puzzle.

Integrating Memories

For most of us, most of the time, our stories make sense and everything runs smoothly. But sometimes we get a bunch of implicit memories that we just can’t seem to fit into our own narratives. It’s as if, while working this jigsaw puzzle, we somehow grabbed a handful of pieces from another box. When this happens, we have to ‘change the picture’ of our life stories to incorporate these new puzzle pieces. This process of fitting the new pieces into the puzzle is called integration.

If we are able to successfully integrate all of these implicit memories, then there’s no problem. If we have difficulty making some of the pieces fit, it usually means that we’d have to change our worldview and re-write our own narrative in order to fit those pieces into the puzzle. This can be a frustrating experience. Sometimes that frustration manifests in emotional aggression.

Living a life of consistency means finding a way to make all of the pieces fit without getting frustrated or without having to act out in emotionally aggressive ways. By learning to integrate our True Selves into the story of our lives, we fit all of our implicit memories into a new narrative memory that creates this new paradigm. When all of these pieces have fit together, we are living at the core of our True Selves.

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Mindful Walking

mindful walking the coyote walk

Mindful Walking utilizes mindfulness and ecopsychology as emotional regulation skills. This is especially true if you are able to do this exercise outdoors. Mindful walking may be used to de-fuse potential emotional aggression. If you feel that one of your triggers has been activated, and you can take a break, go outside and do a little mindful walking!

The goal of a mindful walking exercise is to increase self-awareness by focusing on the sensations your body experiences while walking. Your brain takes in about 2 billion bytes of information per second. Of all this information being taken in, you are usually only conscious of about 4000 bytes of this information. This Mindful Walking exercise helps you to learn to become more consciously aware by learning to focus on only one thing at a time. By being present in the moment, we learn to let go of worries about the past, and anxieties about the future.

It is preferable to do this exercise outdoors if possible, but if necessary you may also do the exercise indoors. You may wish to make a recording of it for your mp3 player so that you may take it with you while you walk, or you can watch the video below to get a good idea of the process. the video below is for the Coyote Walk Meditation, a type of mindful walking that we use in our Ecospirituality Program.

Mindful Walking Instructions

Read over the instructions below, then try it on your own:

  • Start by standing with your feet about shoulder width apart, with your weight evenly distributed. Your hands should hang loosely and freely by your side. Gaze at the ground about five or six feet in front of you. Don’t focus your eyes on anything…just allow your eyes to relax.
  • Center yourself before beginning to walk by taking a few deep breaths before beginning to walk. Don’t begin to walk until your attention and intention are focused on the moment. Shift from Doing Mode to Being Mode.
  • When you are ready, slowly lift your right leg in preparation for taking the first step.
  • As you step, focus on feeling every muscle in your leg. Note what each muscle is doing as you move. Don’t hurry the step. Just allow yourself to experience all the sensations that your leg is giving to you. Step forward until your right foot makes contact with the ground. Notice how your foot makes contact with the surface.
  • Did your heel touch first, or was it your toes?
  • Did you feel the pressure of contact first with the inside edge of your foot, or with the outside edge?
  • Now as you begin to bring your left foot forward for another step, notice how the weight changes on your right foot. Is it changing from heel to toe, or the other way around? Where do your feet feel the pressure? Can you feel the pressure move across your right foot as you make the next step?
  • Now as you bring your left foot forward to make contact with the ground, repeat the procedure. Note how the pressure and weight change over your left foot and leg as you prepare to make another step with your right foot.
  • Continue on, walking in the same manner, paying attention only to the way your body moves as you continue to walk. Focus only on the sensations your body continues to give you.
  • At times you may find yourself becoming distracted. If you notice a fragrance on the breeze, or if an animal crosses your path, or if you hear a bird singing, your mind may wander from the sensations of walking. If this happens, simply stop walking until your attention returns to you.
  • Sometimes the distractions are not in the environment, but in your mind. If thoughts and feelings take your mind off of the walking, then once again, stop walking until your mind returns to focusing only on the walking.
  • Remember that the goal of this exercise is to practice paying attention to only one thing at a time, and one thing only. If you feel tempted to begin thinking about the past or the future, stop walking until your thoughts and feelings return only to the sensations of the walking.
  • As you continue to practice Mindful Walking as part of your daily routine, your mind will become more calm and relaxed. Mindful walking is something that you can practice at any time during the day whenever you need a quick break from doing.
  • As you continue to practice focusing on only one thing at a time, you we gain more control over your own thoughts and feelings. You will become less prone to periods of overwhelming emotions and thoughts. You will also learn to experience the joy and the happiness within you.
  • Continue your walk, directing your attention only to the sensations of your walking. As you come to an end to this mindful walking meditation, slowly take your last step, and come to a stop, resting comfortably where you stand.
  • End the meditation by taking a few deep breaths and expanding your awareness to the environment around you. You may wish to do a mindful meditation during your mindful walking exercise as well.

Use the Mindful Walking meditation whenever you have the opportunity to take a quick break; especially if you find yourself experiencing anxiety or depression. Strong emotions can lead to emotional aggression, and you can de-fuse such ruminating cycles by shifting from Doing Mode into Being Mode. Mindful Walking helps you to do this by taking energy out of the thinking cycle and shifting it into the sensing cycle.

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Mindfulness and Control

mindfulness and control

“He who angers you conquers you.”

-Elizabeth Kenny

Mindful Ecotherapy relies on the 7Cs of family resilience. These resilience factors help you to better weather the storms that come with life.

The second ‘C’ of the 7Cs of family resilience is “control.”

If someone has the ability to anger you, then that person just controlled you.

If you allow others to ‘make’ you feel angry, you have relinquished control over your own emotional well-being.

Similarly, anger is often the result of failed attempts to control others. By analyzing our beliefs about control, we learn to manage our moods so that control is no longer an issue.

Once there was a sculptor who was famous for his carvings of animals. Of all the animals he carved, his elephants were the most lifelike and inspiring. One day an art student came to him and asked him the secret to creating such beautiful elephants.

“The answer,” he said, “Is simple. You just get a block of marble and chip away anything that doesn’t look like an elephant.”

When difficulties arise in a relationship, it’s usually because we’ve set out to carve an elephant, but we suddenly find ourselves carving a bear or a donkey or some other animal instead. When this happens, we’ve gotten caught up in the details of living, and we have lost sight of our original goal, the elephant.

Go over your list of standard arguments with your partner, and decide for yourselves which ones will lead to a happier relationship, and which ones involve side issues (i.e., arguments that are not ‘carving the elephant.’) You may disagree with your partner over which ones are which, and that’s okay too.

Maybe your version of the elephant is slightly different from your partner’s version. Just remember that by sharing your vision of a happier relationship with your partner, you can both come to agreement on what sort of elephant you would like to carve together.

The first step is agreeing that you will focus only on those actions that lead to the end result you both want. Once you’ve agreed on that end result, you can both begin to ‘chip away’ anything that doesn’t look like the relationship you both want to share.

Remember to keep it focused on solutions. You can talk about the problem all day if you wish, but that doesn’t do anything to actually solve the problem.

If your intention is to have a happy, healthy relationship, then anything that doesn’t promote that is irrelevant. It’s just marble to be carved away. If you find yourself constantly discussing problems, and never reaching resolution, ask yourself, “What is my intention?” or perhaps, “Is this the elephant I’m trying to carve, or is it just excess marble?”

If both you and your partner have the same intention, then the rest is just details. You’re working towards a common goal, and all that remains is to resolve how you both approach the common goal.

If, on the other hand, you both have different intentions, then you both have different goals. This is the source of a lot of friction in relationships.

Always remember that you can only control your own intentions, and not your partner’s. Use your mindful communication skills to find common ground and to avoid the temptation to try to control others.

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Internal Validation vs. External Validation

Internal vs. external validation emotional aggression

`“If it’s never our fault, we can’t take responsibility for it. If we can’t take responsibility for it, we’ll always be its victim.”`

-Richard Bach, author

Internal Validation is the art of validating ourselves. We all like to be validated. It’s why we have relationships in the first place. We enter relationships so that others can support us emotionally. This can become a problem if we come to expect that others are responsible for validating us. Emotional aggression happens when we try to force others to validate us.

While others can choose to validate us by acting in emotionally supportive ways, we can also choose to validate ourselves. If others are validating us, then that validation is external because it is coming from someone besides ourselves. If, however, we are able to meet our own emotional needs, we are internally validated. It’s nice to have both, but there may be times when others cannot satisfy our emotional needs. In those times, it helps to be able to meet those needs ourselves.

The only healthy way to be emotionally validated by others is when others are willingly granting us such validation and support. If we attempt to force such support from others, we are acting from emotional aggression.

If we engage in fault-finding in an attempt to seek validation, we are projecting blame. Projecting blame is emotional aggression, because we are abdicating responsibility for our own emotional validation by attempting to blame, shame, or guilt others into emotionally supporting us against their will.

If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of a guilt-trip, you know that it is not a pleasant experience. If you’ve ever been the victim of a guilt-trip, ask yourself, “Is trying to make me feel guilty more likely or less likely to make me emotionally validate you?”

Now turn that around and put the shoe on the other foot. If you’re projecting blame onto your partner by trying to shame them or guilt them into doing what you want, do you think that such behavior is more likely or less likely to get the results you want?

If others are not meeting your emotional needs, and you are seeking external validation by behaving in emotionally aggressive ways in an attempt to get them to submit to your desires, do you really think you’re going to get the results you want? If the other person was doing it to you, would you be willing to respond in the way that they wanted?

Internal Validation is Loving Yourself

One way to avoid the tendency to engage in emotional aggression is to learn the art of internal validation. To be internally validated is to accept responsibility for your own emotional needs. The way to do this is to learn to love yourself.

Sometimes we get caught up in the idea that loving ourselves is somehow selfish or egotistical. But think about that for a moment. If you don’t love yourself, is it really fair of you to expect anybody else to love you? Not only that, but if you don’t love yourself, and you’re in a relationship with someone who loves you, eventually you might find yourself thinking along these lines, either consciously or unconsciously:

“I don’t really love myself, yet this person loves me. If I don’t love myself, yet this person says they love me, then there must be something wrong with him/her! How could a ‘normal’ person love someone like me, when I can’t even love me?”

If you don’t really love yourself, then you can’t really expect others how to love you in the way you’d like to be loved.

To learn to love yourself, first ask yourself, “Who am I, really?” Be as honest as possible when answering this question. In future weeks there will be an exercise to recognize some self-defeating beliefs and replace them with self-affirming beliefs.

For now, think about ways you can learn to love yourself and be happy in your own skin. It might help to talk these things over with your partner or with a friend or family member. A good way to start is to find out what others like about you.

If you feel uncomfortable asking others what they like about you, you could get the ball rolling by making a list of things you like about others, and sharing it with them. I’m willing to bet that they’d be likely to return the favor.

The more you are willing to do so, the more you’ll be able to self-validate as well.